Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Not sure what to title this post...

...or if I should even post it. I will be baring my soul to my family, friends, crush, strangers, everyone... and letting them in on something I want to keep a secret until it goes away.

For the past 3 years now I have been dealing with a horrible 4 letter word that I have never really dealt with in my life. A-C-N-E. I never really had too much of a problem with my skin before becoming pregnant with my son. Occasional breakouts here and there, but nothing a little persa-gel couldn't clear up. Even when I wasn't being responsible or respectful to my face by not always washing it before bed or wearing a ton of makeup, it was never bad.

Then pregnancy came.

The difference in my skin was insane. It wasn't a breakout, it wasn't a few pimples, it wasn't in a couple spots on my face. It was Cystic Acne. SEVERE Cystic Acne, ALL OVER my face. Being pregnant, there wasn't much I could do as far as treatment went. Couldn't use proactiv, or anything with benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid because of the possibilities it would effect my pregnancy. I tried natural organic remedies and tea tree oils. Eventually I just came to terms with it and would either stay in hiding or LOAD the makeup on, which only made it worse.

June 6th, 2011. My beautiful baby boy was born and one of the happy thoughts that came along with him was, GREAT maybe now that he is here my hormones will go back to normal and my skin will clear up. I still couldn't do much to treat it because I was nursing, but it did get better for a little while. I had the Mirena IUD placed soon after he was born as recommended by my OB. I was never informed of any side effects that came along with it. I didn't think much of  it. It was just a form of birth control. Sometimes I wonder had I not have gotten it if things may be different with my skin today.

The acne came and went. Back and forth. I would have a few months where It was manageable but for the most part it was always there. I started to see a dermatologist. A great one. He said my acne was severe and recommended Accutane. I declined due to the side effects and the cost and asked for an alternative. I was prescribed a gel and some heavy duty antibiotics. Since becoming pregnant and dealing with this I became obsessed about taking care of my skin. Washing it twice daily, moisturizing, treating, ect. After a couple weeks I started taking the pills and using the gel I did start to notice a difference. Nothing jaw dropping but my face was starting to clear up. I had maybe 2 months of decent skin.

Summer of this year. Some stressful events came along. Some court drama, my father died, moving twice, new financial responsibilities. Things started getting wild with my face. It got worse than it has ever been, worse than when I was pregnant. I started doing some research on my birth control after seeing a commercial about a lawsuit for it. One of the MANY serious side effects...ACNE!! It even said Cystic Acne. So panicked, I rushed to the OB and had them remove my Mirena IUD. Thinking its possibly the hormones from that causing it. It was painfully removed and I was placed on a BC pill that is supposed to help with acne. It has been a month now since having it removed and it is not showing any signs of slowing down. Its actually gotten worse. Its to the point now where it is effecting my personality. I no longer want to go out. I cant look at myself in the mirror without makeup on. I am struggling with depression and self confidence problems. I have mastered the art of almost concealing it completely with makeup. I airbrush my face makeup almost daily, For my blog posts and instagram beauty posts I use the right lighting, a great camera, flattering angles and skin softening apps to edit. People see my posts and don't see how I am really feeling, how badly I am hurting inside and out.

The physical pain is something else too! Because it is severe cystic acne (what the dermatologist refers to it as), it is extremely painful. My face swells, throbs and burns when I wash it. So not only does it hurt inside when I look into the mirror and see a leper, but it physically hurts too.

So, last night when I was moping around feeling down and out I decided to do some research on a few skin care companies and send them some emails with my story. Some of them responded and some things may be in the works. I agreed to track my progress and this is just the beginning. The first part of my story. I am not yet ready to share photos with the public yet, you can however get a glimpse of it in my blog post "Beauty Tips for Moms on the Go". But I will start sharing before and progress photos when I start a new treatment. This is also for some people whom I am close with to see, to try and understand why I have been avoiding people. It is something too embarrassing for me to just open up about and tell the world. I want to be able to help people who feel like me. I don't want anyone suffering with bad skin to feel alone. Maybe we can fight this together. Gain some of our confidence back. Who knows.

As soon as I get something set in stone with a skin care line, I will be posting a weekly segment tracking my progress and seeing if I can find the right products for my skin type to fight back and get my face back!

Until then, you can still expect to see beauty related posts on my page as well as giveaways and other fun stuff. Thank you for reading and sticking with me. I appreciate all the love and support I get from my subscribers and followers. It means a lot to me.

Glow on my gorgeous friends, hopefully soon I can get my glow back.

Friday, October 11, 2013


Fall is here, Fall is here, its the best time of the year!!!! It is time for darker, sultry makeup. Smoked eyes or deep gem colored lips. This post is inspired by a look that was sent to me from my best friend (HI STEPH). Very glam and very fall. I will go over all products used and a tutorial on the eye makeup as well. The best part about this post is that everything I used was purchased from TARGET! So if you are on a budget but still want to look fabulous this fall then READ ON!
For this look I went FULL GLAM! Meaning, full coverage, played up eyes, and a super trendy dark purple lip. Every product used was purchased from Target.
FACE : CoverGirl Stay Fabulous Foundation
BLUSH & EYES : PIXI Soft Focus Fresh Palette
BROWS : PIXI Natural Brow Duo
LASHES : Sonia Kashuk Full Drama Lashes
LIPS : CoverGirl Lip Duo in 815 "Flashy"
For the face start out with a clean canvas. CoverGirl Stay Fabulous 3 in 1 Foundation is perfect for that full coverage matte look. It lasts all day and all night with no touching up, it wont budge and its affordable. This is probably my GO TO foundation as of right now. I use shade number 820. For the contour I used the darkest color blusher in the Pixi Palette. Then with a lighter pink go over the apples of your checks lightly. The main focus being the contour. With the lightest blush color, I placed that in my highlight zones. On top of the cheekbone under the eye, bridge of my nose, cupids bow, and chin. Below is an in depth tutorial on how I accomplished the eyes. ENJOY!
1. Start with a clean canvas
2. Using a white base (NYX Jumbo Pencil in Milk) Apply to your lids, in the inner corners and around the lower tear duct area. Then taking the White shadow from the palette place it over the white base to set it. Apply it in a patting motion for better color payoff.
3. Using a Fluffy Blending Brush take a very light matte beige color and apply it in a windshield wiper motion above your crease. This is what's called your transition color. Make sure it is blended well. WHEN IN DOUBT, BLEND IT OUT!
4. With a Pencil Brush dab it in a dark brown color. I used the very last shadow color in the palette. Then place it in the crease using the same motion as step 3. Do not go any higher than your transition color.
5. BLEND BLEND BLEND BLEND! Use that same fluffy blending brush from step 3.
6. Using the excess of what is left on your pencil brush I ran it under my lower last line ONLY in the center of the eyes. Don't drag it into the inner or outer corners. Keep it in the center.
7. Using a Black Kohl Pencil I made a very thin liner line along the top lash line and tight-lined underneath the lashes. Tight-lining is totally optional. I do it for every look and personally love it. It makes your lashes appear thicker and fuller.
8. Lastly add your favorite lashes. Mine are the Sonia Kashuk Full Drama Lashes. They are GORGEOUS! So full and luxurious.
That completes the eyes! Let me know in the comments if you have any other questions regarding this.
I love how pigmented and creamy this lipstick is by CoverGirl. Its is the BLASTlipstick duo in number 815 "Flashy". This is the perfect color for fall. It is a warm color that looks great on all skin tones. To apply it I just put it on from the tube, then taking a very small lip brush I lined my lips with the lipstick for a clean precise application.
That sums up this look. Again, all products used were purchased from Target. You can shop for them online at Target.com or head to your neighborhood Target to pick up what you need. If you have any questions regarding this post please feel free to leave them in the comments and I will get back to you. Also, let me know if you have any requests or would like to see more reviews, tutorials, ect. Thanks so much! I hope you loved this post as much as I loved creating it! Love you and GLOW ON!

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Beauty Tips for Moms on the GO!

As a mother of a wild and fun 2 year old boy, I have come to terms with the fact that I don't have an additional two hours laying around taking my sweet time perfecting my appearance. So I have tried mastering the art of making myself look presentable in a matter of minutes. Here are some tips that I have for you and I hope that they are of some use.

1. Focus on the areas that need the most help. If you have great skin, than skip foundation. If you have great brows than you don't need to fill them in. If you have a naturally beautiful lip color then just throw on some chapstick. If you only have a few blemishes then put a dot of concealer on them and blend it. When you only have a few minutes to get ready, don't worry about doing a full face of makeup. Only go after the areas that bother you.

2. AERESOL anything is OUR FRIEND!!! I am a HUGE fan of aerosol makeup. Ever since having my son I have suffered with acne. (Thanks lil dude!) I have always loved the look of a flawless airbrush finished makeup. I even have a few airbrush makeup kits. (that I now have no time to use) After roaming around killing time at the mall inside of Sephora I came across DIOR Airflash and bought it. It is a bit pricey but I have drugstore alternatives for you. All I can say is WOW! It took less than 30 seconds to get a full coverage flawless look without having to clean up any airbrushing equipment. Every last blemish on my face was concealed and covered. It makes me feel like a million bucks. I am also a huge advocate for Sally Hansens Airbrush legs which you can use over your whole body. Sally Hansen also has aerosol makeup however I have yet to try it. I'm sure it is just as good as the airbrush legs.

3. If you have sparse brows, over tweezed brows, or just plain funny brows then listen up. I feel like the brows are one of the most important features on our face. Imagine a world with no eye brows. Funny, right? There are a few products out that I love right now, but we are talking about speed here. I would have to recommend Anastasia Brow Wiz. It is dual sided. One side is the pencil and the other side is a spooley. I've got this down to a science and can fill my sparse brows in, in about 2 minutes. How I fill my brows in is simple. Just outline your brow shape with the pencil. Add additional pencil to any super sparse areas and then run the spooley through your brows to blend it all and get rid of any harsh lines.

4. MASCARA! I cant live without it. If you are lucky enough to have thick and dark lashes then skip it. If you are cursed with light and barely there lashes like me, I recommend Loreal Telescopic mascara. I have it in both brown and black and love how both look. It goes on easily with no clumping and gives you gorgeous natural looking lashes.

5. Add a touch of color to your cheeks, Using either a bronzer or your fave blush. Just so you don't look like a zombie. Takes less than a few seconds, A little color goes a long way!

6. Lastly, if you have super pale lips like I do and need to bring some life to them without looking overly done up some of my favorite colored lip balms are the Maybelline Baby Lips. They hydrate your lips so well while giving them a tint of natural looking color!

I think that sums it up. The quickest makeup tips I have for us moms on the run. It typically takes me about 15 minutes to get ready if I have somewhere I need to be and a difficult toddler who wont let me get ready. Let me know if you have any questions or requests that I can help you with. Hope you enjoyed.